Love Life Is Not As Easy As It Seems

Tell me honestly, is it easy to truly love? Is it easy to have a love life? Is having love life really that simple?

You can only answer this if you have truly loved someone else and out of that love was a relationship. Mahirap when you poured out your heart to that other person and that other person doesn’t love you as much as you did or when that other person doesn’t seem to realize how much you love him or her. You’ve done everything for the other to love you back pero wala. Sobrang hirap kaya nun!

How about kung nagmamahalan kayong pareho? Or mag-asawa na kayo? Di ba mahirap pa rin? Because you have to settle your differences. Dahil meron kang mga bagay na pinaniniwalaang tama na hindi naman tama sa mata ng minamahal mo.

Kapag nagclash, siempre away yan. At dahil nga mahal niyo ang isa’t-isa, at ayaw niyong magkahiwalay, you will have to drag down your pride and change your belief system (even behavior) na tugma sa kapartner mo…or vice versa. You will even love the people your partner loves kahit gaano man kahirap sila mahalin (e.g manugang, kapatid, tiyuhin, etc.)

Dragging down your pride is hard. Ang pag-amin na mali ka ay hindi madali. Changing is hard. Kaya naman marami talagang taong mayayabang kasi napakadaling maging mayabang.

Kung iisipin mo, sino nga naman bang nagsabing madaling umibig? If you believe that it is easy to love and have a love life, it’s either you did not truly love at all or you’re just plain ___. Hindi madaling umibig at hindi madaling manatili sa pag-ibig.

Kaya magtataka ka…bakit gusto mo paring umibig? Why do we still want to love? Bakit tayo magpapaka-martyr sa pag-ibig?

Di ba even though it will be painful and hard, basta makasama lang natin yung isa na yun, mahagkan siya, mapasaya siya, solve na ta’yo. Yung marinig lang yung boses niya, parang pakiramdam mo kumpleto na ang araw mo.

Kung na-inlove ka na, magegets mo to. Medyo cheesy pero totoo naman.

Eto pa isang possible reason kung bakit mahirap umibig. Pano kung yung taong minamahal mo eh hindi gusto ng friends mo o ng pamilya mo? Pano kung yung minamahal mo eh tinutuksong “abnoy?” Pano kung yung minamahal mo eh mamamatay-tao dati? Pano kung yung mahal mong tao is someone the world really hates? Lalong mahirap.

There’s a saying “love conquers all.” What a wise saying it is because using the word ‘conquers’ means there are always things that will hinder love’s way, big or small.

So much for the intro! Let’s get to the main part. =p

I was reading my article entitled Simple Lang where I discussed how simple Christianity is. It is about simply loving Christ.

Sounds simple, right? Sounds good, right?

But as what I was pointing out in the intro, loving and living a love life are not as easy as people think they are.

Imagine yourself as a commoner woman who was suddenly married to a prince who is totally dedicated and loyal to his father king. You fear the king and you love the prince so much.

But now that you are undeniably a royalty by marriage all of a sudden, you have to fit in to the lifestyle of a royalty because this is where you belong now.

You have to be 100% dedicated to the prince. The whole country is looking at you, watching your every move and hearing your every word. Every wrong move you make will immediately be recognized and it will dishonor your prince, make the king angry and you certainly don’t want that to happen.

So many things will have to change. You can’t do ‘commoner’ stuff anymore. There will be so many do’s and don’ts. If before you don’t care about your country, now you will have to have a heart for your people. You will have to love what or who the prince loves regardless of how hard it will be to love them.

You do not have your own plans and dreams anymore. Your actions are not for yourself anymore but for your prince and for you kingdom. You have the duty of a wife and a princess.

Imagine that! It’s gonna be very hard because your world is new all of a sudden. But your fear for the king and your true love for the prince will help you endure, will help you keep going, will help you change.

This is like loving Christ. I am like the commoner woman and Jesus is the Prince of Peace who is absolutely dedicated to Abba Father, Creator of all. When I accepted Him as Lord and Savior, I suddenly became engaged to Jesus. And since I am already part of the Kingdom, I am now called a royalty (holy), I have to prepare myself and live a royal (holy) life since in the kingdom of Jesus’ Father, only royal (holy) people are allowed.

So many things have to be changed: my lifestyle, my words, behavior, mindset, and actions. I am not to do ‘commoner’ (heathen, gentile, ungodly) stuff anymore. I will have to love who the Prince of Peace loves (others: believers and unbelievers) no matter how hard it will be. I do not have my own dreams anymore. My actions are slowly becoming selfless. I now have the duty of a bride, a warrior, and a princess (someone of authority).

Dying to who I am here on earth is one of the hardest thing to do. Surrendering my plans and my dreams is also hard. Renewing of the mind is also not easy. Disciplining my body…lalo na.

But my love for Jesus has made me push through. My love for the Lord made me choose to be changed. This love, by the way, is not something that is of myself. It is from God, through His Spirit, that enables me to truly love Jesus. It is His Spirit that enables me to endure and helps me undergo the biggest changes in my life.

The Prince made it sure that I will be aided in this transition by sending the Holy Spirit who has become my best friend. The process is not instant unlike salvation. Jesus will take us from glory to glory. One step at a time.

It doesn’t mean I don’t sin anymore. The only time we won’t be able to sin is when we’re at heaven already.

But through the principles of forgiveness, the Blood, repentance and surrender (other things I learned), I am being cleansed of my sins every day. So when the time comes na darating na Siya, maaabutan niya akong malinis, blameless and still madly in love with Him.

So am I saying that being a Christian is hard?

If life is hard, then a Christian life is also hard. If life is full of tribulations, so is a Christian life. If you are a genuine Christian, your life and your Christian life is not really different but one and the same.

If I write today that “oh do not worry, Living a Christian life is very easy. You have God to back you up”, I will be lying. Una, God is not there to back you up or to fulfill your purpose or your will. Baliktad po. It is us who will fulfill His purpose and will.

If I say to you now that if you are a Christian, God’s promises (lahat yun) mapupunta sa’yo: blessings, healing, and deliverance. Sure yun! Promise ni God yun eh!

If I tell you consistently that a Christian life is about enjoying the promises of God tapos may nangyaring masama. Anu sa tingin mo mararamdaman mo? The time when you needed God’s miracle the most and it didn’t happen, what would you feel?

“Kala ko ba……?” Then magbabackslide ka na kasi wala namang nangyari eh. Parang nung nangyari sakin. I thought Christianity is all about enjoying life and God’s promises. Little did I know na this is just half true. Tapos nung may nangyaring masama, ayun, I blamed God. I almost shunned Christianity.

Kaya prankahan nalang. Life will still be hard kahit na Kristyano ka (or even harder). Ang kinaiba, if you know God’s intention for your life, and you love and trust your God, you will be able to face those hard times.

Ang kinaiba, kahit gaano kahirap ang pinagdadaanan mo, you know and believe that you will get through it.

Ano ba intention ni God? His intention is to change your character!!! Discipline you. Make you strong! NOT SPOILED! How does God change us? Through fire (tests and trials). Only iron sharpens iron. Only fire (tests, trials) can reveal our gold (our real beautiful and godly self). And God is desperate for your gold to be revealed!

What makes us hold on despite hardships? Faith. Hope. And the greatest is LOVE.

Now if loving and living a love life is not that easy, same with loving and living a love life with Christ. It’s honestly not that easy! Why? Your body will still dictate. Your mind will still want to dominate. Discipline is never easy (at least for me).

And the fact that you can’t see Jesus is an addition. Pero, that’s not an excuse. Kaya nga pinadala si Holy Spirit so that we won’t be orphans.

Yes, Christianity is simply loving Christ but it also means losing your very identity on earth which is not easy. If salvation was a choice we have to make, sanctification (renewing of mind) is also a choice to allow the Holy Spirit or not to work in our lives.

Even the princess in our example has the very choice to renew her ways or not. Choosing not to renew her ways, surrender her will and be transformed just means she does not truly love her prince.

Same with Christians! Do you love the Lord? Like, really?

If we don’t allow the Lord to work in our lives, to separate us from the world and sanctify us, it just means we love the world more than we love Jesus. It’s the harsh truth.

Eto pa, one thing that makes my love life with Jesus not that easy is the fact that the world hates the King whom I love. Parang teledrama, di ba? But it happens in real life. I can feel the oppositions starting from my family even. I need to overcome fear, shame to speak about Jesus to other people. It’s not easy.

Kaso it is the love I have for the Lord that keeps me pushing through. My love for Him (which is also from Him) enables me to take this path that not so many are willing to take. Bakit? Kasi nga mahirap!

Question. Did Jesus live an easy life on earth? Even though He is the Son of God, He too suffered from trials and tests on earth (even to the point of death). If He was not exempted, what more tayo!

Jesus did not die a horrible death for us so that we can have an easy Christian life. Jesus died on the cross so that we can be given the grace, the strength to endure the hardness of life. Na even though the world pushes us to sin, the grace of the Lord pulls us back to righteousness.

Truly, narrow is the road that leads to salvation. But once you discover the door to that narrow road, you will find that you will be walking in holiness without you struggling, without you getting tired and weary. There will be trials and tests, but there will always be victory. And victory that comes after hardship is more glorious than easily attained victory.

Do you know what that secret door is? It is true love for Jesus. True, intimate love. If you know how to truly love a person, then you would know how to truly love Jesus.

AND I DARE YOU! JUST LOVE JESUS CHRIST WITH ALL YOUR REPENTANT AND SURRENDERED HEART and your life will change significantly!

Love life may not be as easy as it seems……but it is worth it. Lalo na with Jesus, your Great Reward.